Make Me Up Mia: A Lifestyle & Beauty Blog

Thursday, September 29, 2016

2016 Sweet Summertime.


I'm excited for all things fall, just like every other girl in the world. The smells, weather, foods, colors, clothes, decor, etc. I love it all. However, I might be the only person who actually hates pumpkin and loves daylight savings time. Something about the early darkness and chill in the air is just cozy to me.

I've also been reminiscing about how amazing these last few months have been. Summer of 2016 was oh so good to us. As I was thinking back, I decided I needed to document all of the special things we did, trips we took, family we loved on, chapters we closed and the adventures we set out on. 


-My 30th in Kansas City. A celebration my husband planned & all of our loved ones attended
-A special visit from our favorite twins, our sweet Florida family
-We sold our first home after 7 years of memories made there
-Moved into our first ever apartment while we house shop, picked downtown Tulsa and it's been a blast
-Our baby girl turned 10. Can't believe it's been 9 years since we rescued her
-Spent a long weekend in Denver with Kim, such a beautiful treat


-Went to a Hillsong concert in OKC with Kristal, it really was life changing
-Had the enormous blessing of sharing my testimony on Dashing Dish
-Celebrated the 30th birthday of my bff/SIL with some of my favorite people
-Celebrated 8 years of marriage with my best friend at a delicious place downtown called Bull in the Alley
-Spent a week in Rodanthe, NC on the beach with 20+ family members. It was the best trip ever
-Developed a new love for reading, this has been my fave read this year so far

Cheers to fall and new chapters to come XO

Friday, August 19, 2016

Just a latte on a Friday.

Eating Disorders Anorexia Orthorexia

I wish it was that simple. 

People with eating disorders often struggle with drinking their calories. I definitely have a problem with this. I love coffee, but I always make my drinks at home or stick to my trusty SKVL from Starbucks. I like having control & knowing what's in it. Since moving to downtown Tulsa though, I've really wanted to try some of what the awesome local coffee shops downtown have to offer. Easier said than done. 

My therapist gives me challenges, this time it's to try 1 latte a week in between our next meeting. When I'm on vacation or with friends, it's a lot easier ordering fun treats. When I'm on my own in my normal day to day routine, I always talk myself out of it. I decided today was the first day, even though I'm already a week and a half behind. No more talking myself out of it, it's Friday and I'm going for it. First up, Foolish Things Coffee Co. 

I'm standing at the counter waiting to place my order and a women comes up to the counter beside me, checking out the yummy treats displayed. She strikes up a conversation with me.

Lady: "That Golden Graham s'mores bar could feed 4 people, did you see this?!"
Me: "Yeah it's pretty big, looks delicious though"
Lady: "It does. Golden Grahams were my favorite cereal as a kid. I haven't had cereal since I was 14!"
Me: "Oh gosh really, you should totally go for it!" 
Lady: "Can you imagine how many calories are in that thing though, probably like a thousand"
Me: "Yeah, but you can share it. It won't kill you, if you're craving it, go for it!" 
Lady: "My business partner who's over at the table with me would be shocked if I came back with that. We own a fitness company. She'd definitely make me do extra burpees for that."
Me: "It's not a big deal, you should go for it!"
Lady: "You're right, I'm getting it!"

I place my order. A 12 oz iced latte with some of their homemade vanilla syrup. Full fat milk & not sugar free syrup, big deal for me but I've got this. I'm going to enjoy this.

Lady steps up to the counter and orders. "You know what, I've totally changed my order. I'll take an iced latte with almond milk and lavender syrup." I guess she just couldn't do it. 

My order then took about 15 minutes and I was going to be late if I didn't hit the road quickly, they tell me it was coming in less than a minute. They called my name and handed me a hot latte. I ordered iced, but I'm out of time. I take it and quickly head to work, not even sure if I'm going to be on time now. (I HATE being late!) 

So many thoughts were running through my mind during this 45 min time span on this Friday morning in August. I wanted to cry. I wanted to tell this lady the significance of this latte order for me, tell her to please just stop & enjoy the cereal bar. Tell her she is saying everything to me I'm so desperately trying to forget. I felt anxiety. I felt defeated in that moment. I was stressed because I was watching the clock, and then running late. I was bummed after all of that, my order was wrong. So many emotions. 

BUT, I refuse to let the devil take over this moment. He tried, he tried to ruin it for me but I will not allow it. I was driving almost 80 mph hour on the way to work, praying the whole time. Yeah, praying for safety and to not see a cop... but mostly that these feelings would quickly be replaced with happiness and love. Praying for peace & strength, to not let this morning discourage me in anyway. I'm sitting here enjoying my latte now, thinking about where #2 is going to come from :)

Happy Friday. I hope you're enjoying a yummy treat today. 

Tuesday, August 2, 2016

Dashing Dish Beauty for Ashes - My Testimony.


It's been a year since my life took a major turn. A rough year full of change, therapy, depression, anxiety and more self-focus than I ever thought I'd be comfortable with. I am so thankful for every last drop of it though. I needed it to happen, I needed to be set free. I've grown and I'm a better person now. Hard times aren't always a bad thing.

A couple of weeks ago I had the honor of sharing my testimony with Dashing Dish readers. I love Katie's recipes and her story, it's so similar to mine. She is the absolute sweetest, and I've found her site to be a huge help over the last year. Dealing with anorexia, hypothalamic amenorrhea, depression & anxiety has been by far the hardest thing I've ever faced. It's a lot more common than you'd think though, and becoming even more so thanks to our current society. Sharing my testimony was important & therapeutic for me. I went through so much, and still struggle for sure, but being in a place where your only choice is to give it to the Lord was life changing in so many ways. I believe we are faced with hard things to make us stronger, strengthen our relationship with the Lord and to help others. I don't know His plans, but I trust in Him.

You can read my testimony here.

Anorexia Orthorexia Hypothalamic Amenorrhea


Wednesday, April 27, 2016

Currently // April 2016


Listening 
-Lauren Daigle's album, on repeat. Thank you Amazon Prime music. 

Eating
-Carrots + hummus. Every. Single. Day.
-All of the Dashing Dish recipes. I can't recommend her site & recipes enough. So many fast, delicious & healthy recipes. I am a paid member (totally worth the $7 a month) but she has a lot of free recipes too. She's such a sweet girl too, love her and all she stands for.

Drinking 
-Spark (any flavor) + La Croix (any flavor)
Side note- am I the only one that thinks La Croix by itself is disgusting? Not eh, but EW. 

Wearing
Stila Stay All Day Liquid Lipstick in Baci
Nars Lipgloss in Angelika 

Watching

Quantico, Nashville and The Catch are all our favorites right now. Also loving daily Alex & Michael vlogs.

Reading
-Books / I just finished Fervent and For the Love. Currently reading Truly Fed and about to start Love Does with my bible study group. 
-Blogs / Yeah...Immaeatthat and The Real Life RD are my 2 new favorite blogs to read. Both are registered dietitians who have an awesome approach when it comes to eating. Loving them both.
-Cupcakes and Cashmere & The Everygirl, I'm late to the game...

Excited About 
-Moving! We listed our house for sale late March and plan to rent for a year or two before we purchase again. We decided to rent an apartment in the downtown Tulsa area for that duration and we're both so excited. We love Tulsa and spend a lot of time in the downtown areas, so it will be fun to really enjoy being in the heart of it all for a bit. Also, VACATION- We've rented a huge house in Rodanthe, NC with my in-laws and I couldn't be more excited about a week long beach vaca with everyone. Come on September! 

Missing
-All of our sweet nieces and nephews. Oh and PLL too :( 

Craving
-An old fashion donut, I should probably make a pit stop one morning soon... 


What are you reading or watching right now? 

Friday, April 22, 2016

Hypothalamic Amenorrhea - The 5 Things that Helped Me Most.


I recently shared my story about developing Secondary Hypothalamic Amenorrhea (HA for short) last year and how I was able to regain my cycle. While I did regain my monthly cycle and I'm in a much better place mentally, I'm still dealing with disordered eating issues and some anxiety surrounding food. This was the main cause of HA for me. Some days are great, some not so much. I have to often remind myself though, it's about progress not perfection. 

I received some emails & messages after my last post from women who were recently diagnosed or struggling with HA. This is exactly why I decided to open up about my journey, to open up the communication with other women. It always helps to know you aren't alone.

Secondary HA is typically caused by under-eating (eating disorders, restriction, etc.) and/or excessive exercise. It is often a combination of the two. Make sure that you are in tune with what has caused HA for you. Before you can heal, you have to know what is causing it. These are things I did, had to realize & that made an important difference for me. 

Weight gain is ok
You HAVE to realize that where you're at right now, in this state where you've lost your cycle, is not a healthy place. Chances are you're going to have to gain some weight, and even though it might be tough to grasp at first, it might be necessary. Your body does NOT define you. We were not put on this earth to obsess over food choices or our bodies. We are perfect in His eyes and that is what truly matters. There is so much light at the end of this tunnel, I SWEAR. The sooner you realize this, the faster your healing begins. Trust me when I say this, you're body is not going to blow up the way you think it will. You might need to gain 5, 10, 15, 20 lbs. Who knows, but whatever changes it does make.... they're necessary. 

Surround yourself with all things positive
This was a big one for me. I was obsessed with fitness people- their diets, their workouts, all the articles that tell you what to do to achieve whatever it is that you think is "perfect." I immediately had to un-follow them all. Here's the deal, our society is obsessed with looking a certain way but the thing is, we're all made so different. You can not compare yourself to anyone, it's like comparing apples to oranges. What did this look like for me? I stopped following people on all social media that triggered me, people that always post about fitness or good/bad diet choices. I don't even open articles that talk about food, weight loss or fitness. I work out when I want and I try make healthy choices with food, but I do it on MY terms now. Nobody else can have any influence on my food choices or amount of days I workout. I started following other people who have been through this, who 100% get it. Two of my favorite resources have been Maddy Moon (blog, podcast, YouTube) and This Girl Audra (YouTube). They have both been, and continue to be, so incredibly helpful! 

Relax yourself- mind and body
For so long, I truly didn't know how to relax at all. I'd stress about an upcoming free weekend and feel it had to be planned out by the hour, it would cause me so much anxiety. I used to dream about what it would be like to have a relaxing weekend with no plans. It didn't used to be a possibility for me. After my diagnosis, I knew things had to change. I had to let a lot of things go- my work out schedule, tracking calories, meal prepping, blogging. Anything that kicked my brain into OCD planner mode, had to stop. It's been glorious. Let yourself relax, you're body needs to heal. This is so important. 

Support is key, it's ok to get help
Don't try to do this alone. Finding the HA support group on Facebook (here) helped me a lot. It can be isolating and you can feel alone. You're basically having to do the complete opposite of what the world tells women to do and that can be such a hard task. I'll be honest here, I'm now seeing a therapist & a dietitian that specialize in eating disorders. I wish I would have done this sooner. Having a good support system is huge. Dustin has been amazing throughout all of this, but at the same time, I don't want to always bombard  him with my issues. It's nice to have support from people that specialize in these issues. So whatever that means to you, make sure you have it. 

Surrender it all to Him
This might not be for everyone, but for me it was a big one. Last year when I was so bad and obsessed with eating "right" and exercise, it 100% became my idol. My relationship with the Lord was put on the back burner. When I finally woke up and realized this, when I truly surrendered it all to Him, I started to notice the biggest changes. I'm so thankful for His love and grace. My mind quickly started to shift in ways I didn't think were possible. Guarding my heart daily and praying in those hard moments, life changing. I plan on sharing more of my testimony soon, but please know that when you're at rock bottom, I promise you that there IS hope. 

1 last very important reminder.... 
Eating Disorders
Progress is what we're after, NOT perfection. Perfection doesn't exist.
 
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